【考前特训】06.概要写作之记叙文-2022年上海高考英语考前写作冲刺强化集训.docx

1、备战高考概要写作之记叙文理论指导及实战演练要点精析记叙文概要写作技巧 记叙文(Narration)：找出时间(when),地点(where),什么人(who),做了什么事(what),为什么做(why),结果怎么样(how)六要素。其中,最重要的要点是某人(who)做了何事(what)。若是夹叙夹议的文章,还要加上作者的看法、观点、经验或感悟。1.叙事性的记叙文(Narration)。叙事性的记叙文的主要内容的概括主要抓住记叙文的几个要素：时间、地点、人物、事件和影响或后果。2. 写人的记叙文（Description）。写人的记叙文总结要点主要抓住人物的主要特点或事迹，划出关键词（所谓关键词是

2、文中反复出现的体现主题或关联的词）。记叙文概要写作模板 记叙文体的阅读材料，相比其他文体而言，写概要相对容易。在写概要前，除明确文章主题外，还应抓住六个要素：when, where, who, what, why, how。在这六个要素中，所占内容比重最大的是what。一般来说，记叙文的故事概要可以用这样的模板来表示：记叙文：what / who / when / where / why / how Who did what bybecause当然，不是说每个故事概要都包含how或why，有时两者选其一即可。保留：When? Where? Who? What? Why? How?删除细节删除具

3、体例子（引用一两个说明问题即可）避免重复 要点整合 1) 提炼 同义转换: 近义词、同义词等替换句子重构: 调整词类、时态、语态等2) 语言 3) 衔接（照应、替代、省略、连接和词汇衔接 ） 课堂典例例文 1：The Renaissance (15th to 16th century)（1）During the Renaissance, new ideas and values gradually replaced those held in the Middle Ages. People began to concentrate less on religious themes and ad

4、opt a more humanistic attitude to life. At the same time painters returned to classical Roman and Greek ideas about art. They tried to paint people and nature as they really were. Rich people wanted to possess their own paintings, so they could decorate their superb palaces and great houses. They pa

5、id famous artists to paint pictures of themselves, their houses and possessions, as well as their activities and achievements. （2）One of the most important discoveries during this period was how to draw things in perspective. This technique was first used by Masaccio in 1428. When people first saw h

6、is paintings, they were convinced that they were looking through a hole in the wall at a real scene. If the rules of perspective had not been discovered, no one would have been able to paint such realistic pictures. By coincidence, oil paints were also developed at this time, which made the colours

7、used in paintings look richer and deeper. Without the new paints and the new technique, we would not be able to see the many great masterpieces for which this period is famous. Step 1. Determine the type of writing and identify the topic as well as the authors purpose确定体裁，明确主题 l 体裁： 记叙文 l 主题： 文艺复兴时期

8、的艺术 Para 1Topic sentence:Idea 1:Idea 2:Para 2Topic Sentence:Information about perspective: Put forward: Content:Assistance: Step 2. Divide the passage & summarize the main idea of each part明确文章结构 para 1para 1Topic Sentence:“During the Renaissance, new ideas and values gradually replaced ” Idea 1:l “

9、People began to concentrate less on religious themes and adopt a more humanistic attitude to life.”Idea 2:l “At the same time painters returned to classical people and nature as they really were.”Example: l “Rich people wanted to ”para 2Topic Sentence:l “One of the most important discoveries during

10、this period was how to draw things in perspective.”Information about perspective: l Put forward: Masaccio; 1428l Content: “looking through a hole in a wall at a real scene.”Assistance: l “By coincidence, oil paints were also developed ”Step 3. Highlight the key information of each part划主题句与关键信息 Step

11、 4. Make an outline of the passageStep 5. Write the first draftTopic Sentence: During the Renaissance, new ideas and values gradually replaced those held in the Middle Ages.Rewrite: In the Renaissance, new viewpoints were in place of those hundreds years ago.同义转换Idea 1: People began to concentrate l

12、ess on religious themes and adopt a more humanistic attitude to life. Rewrite： Firstly, people focused more on humanistic themes rather than religious ones. 衔接词句型转变Idea 2: At the same time painters returned to classical Roman and Greek ideas about art. They tried to paint people and nature as they r

13、eally were.Rewrite： 删除细节 Secondly, painters returned to classical ideas which were focused on real people and nature. Step 6. Revise the summaryPeople had new viewpoints during the Renaissance. People focused more on humanistic themes rather than religious ones. Meanwhile, painters preferred the cla

14、ssical ideas and painted real people and nature. (29 words)The perspective proposed by Masaccio in 1428 became the typical painting characteristic in that period. With the development of oil paints, people felt like seeing reality through a hole. (29 words) 例文2：(1) There is nothing fixed about attit

15、udes to dirt (topic sentence)(2) In the early 16th century, people thought that dirt on the skin was a means to block out disease, as medical opinion had it that washing off dirt with hot water could open up the skin and let ills in. A particular danger was thought to lie in public baths. By 1538, t

16、he French king had closed the bath houses in his kingdom. Sodid the king of England in 1546. Thus began a long time when the rich and the poor in Europe lived with dirt in a friendly way. Henry IV, King of France, was famously dirty. Upon learning that a nobleman had taken a bath, the king ordered t

17、hat, to avoid the attack of disease, the nobleman should not go out.(3) Though the belief in the merit of dirt was long-lived, dirt has no longer been regarded as a nice neighborever since the 18th century. Scientifically speaking, cleaning away dirt is good to health. Clean water supply and hand wa

18、shing are practical means of preventing disease. Yet, it seems that standards of cleanliness havemoved beyond science since World War . Advertisements repeatedly sell the idea; clothes need to be whiter than white, cloths ever softer, surfaces to shine. Has the hate for dirt, however, gone too far?(

19、4) Attitudes to dirt still differ hugely nowadays. Many first-time parents nervously try to warn their children off touching dirt, which might be responsible for the spread of disease. On the contrary, Mary Ruebush, anAmerican immunologist (免疫学家), encourages children to play in the dirt to build up

20、a strong immunesystem. And the latter position is gaining some ground. 1: Read for topic and structure Tip 1 (topic sentence): There is nothing fixed about attitudes to dirt (structure): (2), (3), (4) 2. Explore （探究） supporting ideas find out the topic sentences of each paragraph, leaving out unnece

21、ssary pointsTip2: Explore for topic sentences, leaving out unnecessary points3: Paraphrase（改写） Tip 3: Paraphrase with synonyms(同义词） There is nothing fixed about attitudes to dirt. Attitudes to dirt vary in different times. People hold different/mixed opinions towards dirt over time.Paraphrase with s

22、ynonyms（同义句） thought that dirt on the skin was a means to block out diseasedefended their bodies against the attack of disease.considered dirt on the skin helped resist illness. protected people from getting ill. regard dirt on the skin as a barrier against diseaseTip 4: Paraphrase（改写） with structur

23、es (participle分词, with-structure结构, emphatic sentence强调句 and so on)In the 18th century, regarded cleaning away dirt is good to health It was not until .that peole came to believe washing off dirt benefited health.Centuries later, people came to adopt /employ / subsribe to a scientific view on dirt,

24、considering it a healthy practice to remove dirt off the skin. encourages children to play in the dirt to build up a strong immunesystemplay with dirt help strenghthen their immune system. exposure to some dirt may help/ boost our immune system. 4: Polish （润色） Tip 5: Polish with connectives to make

25、it coherent. People hold mixed opinions towards dirt on our skin. In the 16th century, people of some European countries, believed that dirt protected people from getting ill. However, since 18th century, people began to believe that washing dirt off our body can keep us healthy. But, nowadays, some

26、 scientists believe that exposure to some dirt may help our immune system.例文3：Many seniors feel pressured to go straight from high school to college but Camden Olson, who graduated from Latin School of Chicago in the US last year,didnt give in. She decided to spend a gap year raising a guide dog for

27、 Guiding Eyes for the Blind in Maine.The nonprofit provides trained guide dogs to blind and visually impaired people.“I can say Im living the dream, Olson said. “This is something Ive always wanted to do.,Taking a year off before college, commonly known as a gap year, is becoming more and more popul

28、ar among American teenagers. According to a survey by the American Gap Association, enrollment in these programs grew 27 percent between 2012 and 2013. Some students use the year off to figure out what they want to do, travel the world, or save money for college.Olson is using her time to pursue a p

29、assion shes had since 7th grade. For years, she kept an eye on guide dog services until she came across the opportunity at Guiding Eyes. With support from her friends, family and teachers, Olson went for it.Olsons volunteer work centers around Derby, ,a 1-year-old black dog. “My job is to raise him

30、to be well-mannered and socialized, she said. “Guide dogs have to ignore any distractions. They go everywhere with their visually impaired handler. They give a blind person a lot of independence and emotional support, too.”Of course, theres an end in sight for Derby and Olsons close bond. When Derby

31、 celebrates his own graduation, Olson will have to say goodbye to him.While some look at gap years in a negative light, Olson said shes seen major success. In fact, shell be attending Princeton University this fall and is thinking about majoring in ecology and biology.“I think Im already much more m

32、ature than I was and aware of what really matters,” she said. “So many kids do come back from gap years a lot more focused and prepared. ”参考答案：Like many other high school graduates, Olson was determined to take advantage of her gap year to train a guide dog,which was what she longed to do for a long

33、 time.(要点 1) Not only did Olson accomplish the task of training Derby to be capable of its workto help people with visual disabilities, (要点 2) but she herself benefited much from this experience.(要点 3)分析过程：一、试题详解核心内容本文是一篇记叙文,主要讲述Olson决定利用gap year来训练导盲犬,这是她自七年级以来的梦 想。Olson选择把这一年的时间用来训练Derby,使它能够胜任导盲犬

34、的工作,给视力障碍人士提供帮 助,而这次经历也有助于她的成长。写作思路（1）记叙文是记叙人物的经历或事物的发展变化过程为主的一种文体。这篇文章以人物为中心叙述事情。所以我们要交代清楚人物（Camden Olson)、时间（last year after graduating senior school)、事 由（raise a guide dog called Derby),这样文章的脉络就一目了然,有助于概括大意。（2）确定要点,使其结构紧凑,过渡自然。本文要点1是全文的中心,即Olson高中毕业后打算用 gap year来培训导盲犬,这也是她长久的愿望。要点2说明训练的结果,要点3则是Ol

35、son从中的收获。在确定要点后就要运用自己的语言有效地组织。实战演练演练1Directions: Read the following passage. Summarize the main idea and the main point(s) of the passage in no more than 60 words. Use your own words as far as possible.Discovering a lost brother Kieron Graham always knew he had an older brother named Vincent. Though

36、 Kieron spent years thinking about him, he could never track him down. That changed in December 2017, when Kierons adoptive parents gave him an AncestryDNA test as a Christmas gift. Kieron, now 21, sent his saliva (唾液) sample in for analysis. When his results came back, he was stunned to find he had

37、 a lot of DNA matches for relatives who had also taken the test. Most were distant connections, but one match was so strong that it was labeled “close family.” His name was Vincent Ghant. Kieron looked for him on Facebook and soon made a possible connection. “This is going to sound so wild but I thi

38、nk youre my brother,” Kieron wrote on Facebooks Messenger app. “I was given up for adoption in 1997 and it says on my paperwork that my mother has a son with your name and your birth date. Her name is Shawn.” “OMG do you know your real name?” wrote Vincent, now 30. “I think it was Tyler.” “OMG YES!

39、You are my brother.” “Wow,” wrote Kieron. “This is crazy,” said Vincent. The craziness was just beginning. As they talked, the brothers realized they lived about 20 minutes from each other. More surprising, they attended the same university and majored and minored in the same subjects: political sci

40、ence and legal studies. Vincent was nine when Kieron was born and remembers caring for his baby brother. But times were tough, and Shawn, who worked 15-plus hours a day as a nurse, decided that placing Kieron for adoption would give him the best chance to succeed. “She was very emotional about that

41、time, to the point where it was hard for her to put into words anything about what happened,” Vincent says. Now the brothers had the chance to make up for lost time. They decided to meet at a local tea shop that week. One of Vincents concerns was that Kieron might resent his birth family for placing

42、 him for adoption. He was relieved Kieron didnt, and that hed grown up in a loving family. Since that first meeting, the brothers have bonded even more. They play football together and celebrated Christmas with their families. “Well keep growing our relationship until its time to leave this planet,”

43、 says Vincent. That shouldnt be hard. As Kieron says, “Weve got years and years to catch up on.”【解析指导】1. Main idea 本文讲述了一对分开多年的兄弟重聚的故事。文章前半部分主要讲Kieron如何通过基因检测和Facebook找到了他的哥哥 Vincent，后半部分讲述了他们重聚之后的往来，以及迅速建立感情。2. Text structure全文可以划分为三个部分：-第一部分：Kieron通过基因检测和Facebook找到了他的哥哥。-第二部分：Kieron的妈妈为什么放弃他，让别人领养

44、他。-第三部分：Kieron和哥哥重聚后，迅速建立感情。3. Mind map4. Writing procedureStep 1：细读全文，明确主题。本文主要是讲述了一对分开多年的兄弟重聚的故事。Step 2：划分要点。记叙文注意是找who / what / when / where / why / how who：Kieron what: found his brother Vincent when/why: 文中划线处 where: 无需强调 how: through an AncestryDNA test and FacebookStep 3：标主题句或关键词。已在文中用横线标出每段主

45、题句。Step 4：概括。5. Summary writingKieron, given up for adoption reluctantly by his mother when he was a baby, found his brother Vincent through an AncestryDNA test and Facebook. Surprisingly, they lived quite close to each other and studied the same subjects in the same university. After their first me

46、eting, the two brothers quickly bonded and would enhance their relationship in the years to come. (60 words)演练2Directions: Read the following three passages. Summarize the main idea and the main point(s) of the passage in no more than 60 words. Use your own words as far as possible.On an October aft

47、ernoon last year, James Vernon, 76, was supervising a youth chess club meeting in a conference room in the Morton Public Library in Morton, Illinois. About 16 kids, aged seven to twelve, quietly faced off at two horizontal rows of tables, and James walked from pair to pair, overseeing the matches an

48、d offering tips. Four mothers sat off to the side, waiting for their kids to finish the weekly hour-long session.Suddenly, a stocky teenager wearing glasses burst through the door at the front of the room JTm gonna kill some people! he yelled.At first, James, who was standing in the aisle between th

49、e tables, thought the bizarre sight was a Halloween prank, but then he saw the five-inch hunting knives that the teenager was holding in each hand. The teen, whom police later identified as Dustin Brown, 19, shouted incoherently and began cutting his left forearm with one of die knives. As soon as I

50、 saw those knives and he started shouting, I knew this wasnt a prank/9 says James. UI thought I cant let something terrible happen.James, a former computer-systems architect, spent 44 months in the US Army from 1962 to 1966. He had been trained in hand-to-hand combat, but he decided not to do that a

51、nd to attempt to calm the boy instead by talking to him. Hey, who are you? “Where do you go to school? Whats the problem? James asked the boy. Lets talk about this. Ill listen.“My life is terrible, Dustin replied as he peered down at the floor and continued to cut his arm. While James talked to Dust

52、in on one side of the room, Sandy Rassi, 40, the mother of three of the chess students, stood up on the other side. When she heard James say, Its about time for these kids to head home, she motioned silently for the children to quietly leave the room one by one.When Dustin finally looked up, he saw

53、that the chairs were empty, and he lunged at James.“I think he attacked me because I was the only one left,” says James.Dustin swung the knife toward the mans neck and face, but James caught the blade with his left hand. With his hand bleeding, James continued to fight. He grabbed the necklace Dusti

54、n was wearing with his right hand and jerked him forward. Then James pinned the boy onto a table on his left side, hitting the right side of his collarbone with his uninjured fist. I was trying to get him to drop the knives, says James.It worked. Dustin let go of both weapons, and James kept the att

55、acker under control until Morton police officers arrived a few minutes later.【参考答案】On an October afternoon last year, James Vernon was holding a chess class in a conference room，where 16 kids was having the matches under James Vernons guide. A teenager broke into the room suddenly and wanted to kill

56、 some people. When James Vernon saw him holding the hunting knives, he tried to conciliate the boy by talking to him and then he motioned others to leave the room. When the boy saw the only one person left, he started to attack James Vernon. Although he was badly hurt, James Vernon controlled the at

57、tacker at last because he once served the Army.【解析】【分析】本文是一篇记叙文。文章主要讲述去年10月的一个下午，詹姆斯弗农(James Vernon)正在给孩子们上象棋课，一个十几岁的少年突然闯入房间，想杀人。起初，詹姆斯弗农试图和男孩说话来安抚他，然后他示意其他人离开房间。当男孩看到只剩一个人时，他开始攻击詹姆斯弗农。虽然詹姆斯弗农伤势严重，但詹姆斯弗农最终在警察到来之前控制住了袭击者。【详解】1 要点摘录On an October afternoon last year, James Vernon, 76, was supervising

58、a youth chess club meeting in a conference room in the Morton Public Library in Morton, Illinois. About 16 kids, aged seven to twelve, quietly faced off at two horizontal rows of tables, and James walked from pair to pair, overseeing the matches and offering tips. Suddenly, a stocky teenager wearing

59、 glasses burst through the door at the front of the room Im gonna kill some people! he yelled.He had been trained in hand-to-hand combat, but he decided not to do that and to attempt to calm the boy instead by talking to him.With his hand bleeding, James continued to fight.Dustin let go of both weap

60、ons, and James kept the attacker under control until Morton police officers arrived a few minutes later.2.缜密构思将第1、2,、3三个要点进行重组，将第4、5两个要点进行整合。3.遣词造句On an October afternoon last year, James Vernon was having a chess class for his 16 students, who were having matches with the guide of James Vernons.A t

61、eenager who wanted to kill some people broke into the room suddenly.James Vernon was badly hurt, but he controlled the attacker at last as he was in uniform.【点睛】高分句型1 ：On an October afternoon last year, James Vernon was holding a chess class in a conference room, where 16 kids was having the matches

62、 under James Vernons guide.运用一个复杂的主从复合句对原文第一段和第二段进行了概括。其中where引导的定语从句表达高级。高分句型2：When James Vernon saw him holding the hunting knives, he tried to conciliate the boy by talking to him and then he motioned others to leave the room. 用when引导时间状语从句对第四、五段进行了概括，加上see sb. doing的结构等表达非常高级。演练3Directions: Read

63、 the following three passages. Summarize the main idea and the main point(s) of the passage in no more than 60 words. Use your own words as far as possible.NOTlongago,Iwasatastateconferencewithagrouppreparingforaweekofmeetings.Iwalked intotheroomwhereahandfulofvolunteerswerebusycollating(装订整理)handou

64、ts.IaskedifI couldhelp.Oneoftheladiespolitelysaid“Oh,no,thankyou”andofferedmeachairtojustsit whiletheyworked.Then,anothervolunteercameintotheroom,sawmesittingtheredoingnothingandsaid:“Hey, Larry,comeonoverhere.Theresworktodo,andyoucanhelp.”Heputacoupleofchairstogether, placedtwostacksofhandoutsonthe

65、mandinstructed:“OK,theleftsheetgoesontopoftheright one.”“Fine.Icanhandlethat,”Isaid.Andjustlikethat,Iwasnowpartoftheteam.Thismemberofthegroupsawthatmydisabilitydidnotmeananinabilitytohelp.Later,Ithanked himforhavingincludedme,andaskedwhatmotivatedhisaction.Hesaid:“Well,Ifiguredwith onemoresetofhands

66、wedfinishmorequickly.Iwasjustusingcommonsense.”Imsurethatthekindfolkswhoinitiallyturneddownmyofferofhelpdidnotmeantooffend me.Itjustseemedmoreappropriatetothemtosay“No,thankyou”thantostoptheirworkandtry andfigureouthowtoincludeme.Andthatstherealissuehere.Toooften,peoplewithdisabilities areexcludedwi

67、thintheircommunityorwithinasocialsettingbecauseoftheirdisabilityand notbecauseoftheirinability.Itsimportantforallofustofeelpartofthegroupandtofeelthatwebelong.Itsimportanttoour self-esteem.Anditisevenmoreimportantforpeoplewithdisabilities.Inclusionmeansweare accepted,appreciatedandvaluedasafullandeq

68、ualmemberofthegroup.Itsendsamessagethat states:“Tous,yourabilitiesaremoreimportantthanyourdisability.”Summary：Thearticleisabouttheauthorsexperienceofbeingtreateddifferentlywhenhetriedtoofferhelp asadisabledvolunteerforastateconference.Turneddownbecauseofhisdisabilityinthefirst case,hewaslatertreated

69、equallyandincludedintheworkingteam.Thearticleshowsdisabled peopledonotnecessarilylacktheabilitiestodothings.点睛：讲到记叙文，当然要关注记叙文的几要素，如时间，地点，人物，时间的起因，经过，发展，高潮，结尾等等。记叙文中的conflict，比如自我的冲突（曾经的我和现在的我，表象的我和内心的我），人和人（社会）的冲突，人与自然的冲突等。这篇文章中，也有冲突，冲突让时间的发展产生戏剧效果（dramatize）。这里的冲突主要表现在，作者想要帮忙但被拒绝，之后又被另一人接受；记叙文通常会传递一个message，也是作者写作的意图：abilitiesaremoreimportantthan disabilities.