专题03 应用文写作（3）-研读近十年高考英语满分书面表达聚焦2023高考.docx

1、研读近十年高考英语满分书面表达聚焦2023高考Part1 应用文写作文（三）1.（2020浙江1月高考卷）假定你是李华，你校将举办外国学生中文演讲比赛，请给你的英国朋友George写封邮件邀请他参加。内容包括:1.比赛时间；2.演讲话题；3.报名方式。注意:1.词数80左右；2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。_【答案】Dear George, Im writing to invite you to join us in the “Chinese speech contest for foreigners” to be held in our school. The activity is sc

2、heduled at 8:00 a.m. on January 20th in the lecture hall. The theme of the speech contest is “differences between eastern and western customs”, through which the foreign students are bound to gain a better understanding of Chinese splendid traditional culture and meanwhile strengthen their love of C

3、hina. Immensely fascinated by its mysterious culture and age-old history, you can, undoubtedly give us a wonderful and impressive performance. You are expected to sign up for the contest at www. C. Id appreciate it if you could accept our invitation. Yours sincerely,Li Hua【导语】这是一篇应用文写作。【详解】第1步：根据提示可

4、知, 本篇为一封电子邮件；假定你是李华，你校将举办外国学生中文演讲比赛，请给你的英国朋友George写封邮件邀请他参加。内容包括:1.比赛时间；2.演讲话题；3.报名方式。第2步：根据写作要求, 确定关键词（组） ：Chinese speech contest（中文演讲比赛）；be scheduled（安排）；be bound to（必然）；gain a better understanding of（更好地了解）等。第3步：根据提示及关键词（组）进行遣词造句, 注意主谓一致和时态问题。此处文章主要应用一般现在时。第4步：连句成文, 注意使用恰当的连词进行句子之间的衔接与过渡, 书写一定要规范

5、清晰, 保持整洁美观的卷面是非常重要的。【点睛】范文内容完整, 语言规范, 语篇连贯, 词数适当。作者在范文中使用了较多高级表达方式, 如The theme of the speech contest is “differences between eastern and western customs”, through which the foreign students are bound to gain a better understanding of Chinese splendid traditional culture and meanwhile strengthen thei

6、r love of China.运用了定语从句；Id appreciate it if you could accept our invitation.运用了条件状语从句。全文中没有中国式英语的句式, 显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外, 文章思路清晰、层次分明, 上下句转换自然, 为文章增色添彩。2.（2020全国新课标III卷）假定你是李华，你和同学根据英语课文改编了一个短剧。给外教Miss Evans写封邮件，请她帮忙指导。邮件内容包括:1. 剧情简介；2. 指导内容；3. 商定时间地点。注意:1. 词数100左右;2. 结束语已为你写好。_【答案】Dear Miss Evans,How

7、is everything going! I am writing in sincerity to ask you a favor regarding a play we adapted according to the textbook. Wed like to combine your culture with ours by adapting the classic novel The Steamboat for a short English play. The play is set on a big storm after midnight, on the raft down th

8、e river navigation, we see a steamboat that is going to sink. We saved a scared boy. However, the adaption is quite a challenge. Having written the English script, we dont want anything inappropriate to spoil the play. So would you please spare some time to review the draft script attached to this e

9、mail and make necessary changes? If it is convenient, may I pay you a visit at your office next Tuesday to give you more details?Given your busy schedule, Id be very appreciative if you offer to give some professional advice. Look forward to your early reply. Best regards!Yours truly,Li Hua【导语】本篇书面表

10、达属于应用文，要求考生写一封邮件，请求外教 Miss Evans对于the Steamboat改编短剧的支持。【详解】第一步：审题体裁：应用文时态：根据提示，时态应为一般现在时，一般过去时和一般将来时。结构：总分总法第一段说明写这封邮件的目的；第二段详细说明英语戏剧的剧情介绍和指导内容细节问题；第三段表达感谢，并期待早日得到回复。 第二步:列提纲 （重点词组）write to；according to ；combine ； adaption ；challenge；attached to ；convenient第三步：连词成句根据提示及关键词（组）进行遣词造句，注意主谓一致和时态问题。第四步：连

11、句成篇（衔接词）连句成文，注意使用恰当的连词进行句子之间的衔接与过渡，书写一定要规范清晰。第五步：润色修改【点睛】范文内容完整，要点全面，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当，上下文意思连贯，符合逻辑关系。作者在范文中使用了较多主从复合句，如：If it is convenient, may I pay you a visit at your office next Tuesday to give you more details? 这句话运用了if引导的条件状语从句。全文中没有中国式英语的句式，显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外，文章思路清晰、层次分明，上下句转换自然，为文章增色添彩。3.（2020北

12、京卷推荐信）假设你是红星中学高三学生李华。你们学校英语戏剧俱乐部外籍指导教师Jim因疫情滞留英国。复学在即，作为俱乐部负责人，你给Jim写一封电子邮件，请他推荐一名外籍指导教师，内容包括：1. 条件及要求；2. 表示感谢并提醒注意防护。注意：1. 词数不少于50；2. 开头和结尾已给出，不计入总词数。Dear Jim,_Yours,Li Hua【答案】Dear Jim,How are you doing? I hope everythings OK with you. Our schools drama club plans to start practising. Since youre a

13、way in Britain, we need a drama teacher to be in your place. Would you please recommend one for us? He or she should be a native English speaker, currently in Beijing, and experienced in both directing and teaching.Thank you for your help. Please take care of yourself. Remember to wear a mask when n

14、ecessary. Best wishes, Yours,Li Hua【导语】本篇书面表达是应用文，要求写一封书信。【详解】第1步：根据提示可知，假设你是红星中学高三学生李华。你们学校英语戏剧俱乐部外籍指导教师Jim因疫情滞留英国。复学在即，作为俱乐部负责人，你给Jim写一封电子邮件，请他推荐一名外籍指导教师，内容包括：1. 条件及要求；2. 表示感谢并提醒注意防护。第2步：根据写作要求，确定关键词（组）：drama club (戏剧俱乐部)；plan to do sth.(计划做某事)；in ones place(代替某人)；recommend(推荐)；a native English sp

15、eaker(以英语为母语的人)；currently (目前)；experienced(熟练的)；bothand(两者都)；take care of(照顾)；wear a mask(戴口罩)等。第3步：根据提示及关键词（组）进行遣词造句，注意主谓一致和时态问题。此处文章主要应用一般现在时。第4步：连句成文，注意使用恰当的连词进行句子之间的衔接与过渡，书写一定要规范清晰，保持整洁美观的卷面是非常重要的。【点睛】范文内容完整，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当。作者在范文中使用了较多高级表达方式，如Since youre away in Britain, we need a drama teacher t

16、o be in your place.运用原因状语从句。全文中没有中国式英语的句式，显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外文章思路清晰、层次分明，上下句转换自然，为文章增色添彩。4.（2020新高考全国I卷）假定你是李华, 上周日你校举办了5公里越野赛跑活动。请你为校英文报写一篇报道, 内容包括:1. 参加人员:2. 跑步路线:从校门口到南山脚下:3. 活动反响。注意:1. 写作词数应为80左右:2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。A Cross-Country Running Race_【答案】A Cross-Country Running RaceLast Sunday witnessed

17、 an extraordinary cross-country running race, which nearly drew the attention of every student and teacher of our school.The students selected from every class took part in the competition. The route measured five kilometers, from our school gate to the foot of Nanshan Mountain. Every runner tried t

18、heir best to finish the task, with their classmates along the way giving them necessary help as well as encouragement. At last, all the runners managed to arrive the finish line, receiving cheers from all the directions.The activity was highly spoken of, because not only did it provide chance for us

19、 to exercise, but also made us more cohesive.【导语】这是一篇应用文。本篇要求考生就上周日学校举行的5公里越野赛活动写一篇新闻报道。【详解】体裁:应用文时态:根据提示，时态应以一般过去时为主结构:总分总要求:1. 参加人员2. 跑步路线3. 活动反响第二步:列提纲(重点词组)attend/witness/ draw ones attention/ manage to do sth./ measure/ speak highly of/ provide sth. for sb.第三步:连词成句1. Last Sunday witnessed an ex

20、traordinary cross-country running race, which nearly drew the attention of every student and teacher of our school.2. The students selected from every class took part in the competition.3. The route measured five kilometers, from our school gate to the foot of Nanshan Mountain.4. Every runner tried

21、their best to finish the task, with their classmates along the way giving them necessary help as well as encouragement.5. At last, all the runners managed to arrive the finish line, receiving cheers from all the directions.6. The activity is highly spoken of, because not only does it provide chance

22、for us to exercise, but also makes us more cohesive.第四步:连句成篇(加入衔接词或从句)表示并列的连词:and/but/or/so状语从句连词:because/ if/ though/ although定语从句连词:which/ that/ when/ where第五步:修改润色(加入高级词汇或短语)【点睛】范文内容完整，要点全面，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当，上下文意思连贯，符合逻辑关系。作者在范文中使用了一些高分句型，例如:Last Sunday witnessed an extraordinary cross-country runni

23、ng race, which nearly drew the attention of every student and teacher of our school. 中which引导非限制性定语从句；The activity is highly thought of, because not only does it provide chance for us to exercise, but also makes us more cohesive.中使用了部分倒装。5.（2020全国新课标I卷）你校正在组织英语作文比赛。请以身边值得尊敬和爱戴的人为题，写一篇短文参赛，内容包括:1. 人物

24、简介；2. 尊敬和爱戴的原因。注意:1. 词数100左右；2. 短文题目和首句已为你写好。_【答案】The person I respectWe have a lot of respectable people around us. They may be our teachers, parents or one of our elders. As for me, my father is the person I respect most. My father is a teacher who loves his work and his students very much. He wor

25、ks very hard every day but he will also spare some time to accompany me and share many funny things with me about his work. When I come across the problems of learning in my study, my father will listen to me patiently and encourage me to overcome the difficulties bravely. He achieved a lot in his w

26、ork, respected by his students. So, in my mind my father is the person I respect most and I love him deeply.【导语】本篇书面表达属于应用文。要求学生以身边值得尊敬和爱戴的人为题，写一篇短文参赛。【详解】第一步：审题体裁：应用文。时态：根据提示，时态应为一般现在时。结构：总分法。要求：1.人物简介：2.尊敬和爱戴的原因。第二步：列提纲（重点短语）As for me；spare some time；listen to me patiently;第三步：连词成句1.As for me, my

27、father is the person I respect mostly.2.He works very hard every day but he will also spare some time to accompany me and share many funny things with me about his work.3.My father will listen to me patiently and encourage me to overcome the difficulties bravely.根据提示及关键词（组）进行遣词造句，注意主谓一致和时态问题。第四步：连句成

28、篇1.表示文章结构顺序：介绍人物；阐述原因2.表示并列补充关系：As for; and; but; So第五步：润色修改【点睛】范文内容完整，要点全面，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当，上下文意思连贯。复合逻辑关系。作者在范文中使用了较多的高端句式，如定语从句：My father is a teacher who loves his work and his students very much；非谓语动词：He achieved a lot in his work, respected by his students；时间状语从句：When I come across the problem o

29、f learning in my study, my father will listen to me patiently and encourage me to overcome the difficulties bravely等。文章思路清晰，层次分明，上下句转换自然。为文章增色添彩。6.（2020全国新课标II卷）上周末，你和同学参加了一次采摘活动。请你为班级英语角写一篇短文，介绍这次活动，内容包括:1. 农场情况；2. 采摘过程；3. 个人感受注意:1. 词数100左右；2. 题目已为你写好。题目:My Weekend_【答案】My WeekendOrganized by the st

30、udent union, a group of volunteers went to Hope Farm to help the farmers pick peaches last weekend. The farm is situated at the foot of a mountain, the sky is blue and the air is fresh. We were attracted by the beautiful scenery. There are different kinds of fruit trees as well as a variety of anima

31、ls.On arriving, we saw red ripe peaches hanging on the tree. Using baskets and ladders, We first picked the ones that were most beautiful in color, then those that were ripe and soft. I couldnt wait to take a bite, and the sweet juice went down my throat.I was grateful for this opportunity to get cl

32、ose to nature. Not only would I be able to experience fruit picking, but I could also feast on the sweetness!【详解】第一步：根据提示可知，上周末，你和同学参加了一次采摘活动。请你为班级英语角写一篇短文，介绍这次活动。内容包括： 1. 农场情况； 2. 采摘过程； 3. 个人感受。第二步：根据写作要求确定关键词（组），如：pick peaches, is situated, beautiful scenery, fruit trees ,a variety of animals, Usi

33、ng baskets and ladders, take a bite, be grateful for, get close to nature, feast on the sweetness.第三步：根据提示和关键词（组）进行遣词造句，注意主谓一致和时态问题。本文用一般现在时和一般过去时。第四步：连句成文，注意使用恰当的连词进行句子之间的衔接和过渡，书写一定要规范清晰，保持整洁美观的卷面是非常重要的。【点睛】范文内容完整，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当。作者在范文中使用了较多高级表达方式，如 Organized by the student union, a group of volunte

34、ers went to Hope Farm to help the farmers pick peaches last weekend. 和Using baskets and ladders运用了非谓语动词；We first picked the ones that were most beautiful in color, then those that were ripe and soft. 运用了定语从句；Not only would I be able to experience fruit picking, but I could also feast on the sweetnes

35、s!运用了连词not onlybut和倒装句。全文中没有中国式英语的句式，显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外，文章思路清晰，层次分明，上下句转换自然，为文章增色添彩。7（2020天津卷第一次高考）假设你是晨光中学的李津。下周你校将与英国友好校举办一场在线会议, 探讨如何利用网络学习英语, 请你根据以下提示撰写一篇发言稿：（1）介绍你是如何利用网络学习英语的（至少写出两点）（2）简单谈谈你对利用网络学习英语的看法（3）请友好校的学生分享他们的经验。注意：（1）词数不少于100；（2）可适当加入细节, 使内容充实、行文连贯；（3）开头和结尾已给出, 不计入总词数。Good morning, dear

36、 friends. My name is Li Jin. Id like to take this opportunity to talk about how I learn English on the Internet._Thank you.【答案】Good morning, dear friends. My name is Li Jin. Id like to take this opportunity to talk about how I learn English on the Internet.First, there are a lot of free resources re

37、lated to English on the Internet, so I learn English by reading books or news, listening to postcodes and by watching streaming videos of TV and film. Besides, the Internet gives me the chance to communicate in real-time with native speakers using instant messaging, video calling and online forums,

38、which improves my spoken and written English.Based on my own experience, learning English online is really a great way for English learners. But I have to remind that not everything on the Internet is right and we should learn to identify the wrong information. In the end, I sincerely hope that you

39、can share your experience of learning English on the Internet.【导语】本篇书面表达属于应用文，要求考生写一篇关于如何利用网络学习英语的发言稿。【详解】第一步：审题体裁：应用文时态：根据提示，时态应为一般现在时和一般将来时。结构：总分法总分法指把主题句作为总说，把支持句作为分说，并以这种方式安排所写内容。要求：（1）介绍你是如何利用网络学习英语的（至少写出两点）（2）简单谈谈你对利用网络学习英语的看法（3）请友好校的学生分享他们的经验。第二步:列提纲 （重点词组）resource; be related to; in real-tim

40、e; native speaker; instance messaging; video calling; online forum; a great way; identify; wrong information; share。第三步：连词成句There are a lot of free resources related to English on the Internet, so I learn English by reading books or news, listening to postcodes and by watching streaming videos of TV

41、 and film. The Internet gives me the chance to communicate in real-time with native speakers using instant messaging, video calling and online forums, which improves my spoken and written English.Based on my own experience, learning English online is really a great way for English learners.I have to

42、 remind that not everything on the Internet is right and we should learn to identify the wrong information.I sincerely hope that you can share your experience of learning English on the Internet.根据提示及关键词（组）进行遣词造句，注意主谓一致和时态问题。第四步：连句成篇（衔接词）1.表文章结构顺序：First of all, Firstly/First, Secondly/Second And the

43、n, Finally, In the end, At last2.表并列补充关系：What is more, Besides, Moreover, Furthermore, In addition As well as, not onlybut (also), including,3.表转折对比关系：However, On the contrary, but, Although+clause(从句), In spite of+n/doing,On the one hand,On the other hand Some,while others,as for, sothat 4.表因果关系：Be

44、cause, As, So, Thus, Therefore, As a result 连句成文，注意使用恰当的连词进行句子之间的衔接与过渡，书写一定要规范清晰，第五步：润色修改【点睛】范文内容完整，要点全面，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当，上下文意思连贯，符合逻辑关系。范文句式复杂，如：the Internet gives me the chance to communicate in real-time with native speakers using instant messaging, video calling and online forums, which improves m

45、y spoken and written English.这句话既运用了现在分词做方式状语，又使用了which引导的非限定性定语从句； learning English online is really a great way for English learners.使用了动名词做主语；But I have to remind that not everything on the Internet is right使用了部分否定。另外，文章思路清晰、层次分明，上下句转换自然，为文章增色添彩。8.（2020天津卷第二次高考）假设你是晨光中学高三学生李津。你校于6月8日举办了成人礼活动，你的英国

46、朋友Chris很想了解该活动。你于当晚给Chris回一封电子邮件，介绍有关情况，内容包括:(1)成人礼活动内容(成长点滴回顾、观看校友抗疫事边录像)；(2)对活动的感受；(3)对自己未来的展望。注意:(1)词数不少于100；(2)可适当加入细节，使内容充实、行方连贯；(3)开头已给出，不计入总词数。参考词汇:成人礼 the coming-of age ceremony新冠脑炎 COVID-F9Dear Chris,Im so glad to hear from you._Yours,Li Jin【答案】Dear Chris,I am so glad to hear from you. The

47、coming-of-age ceremony was held in our school on June 8th this month. During the coming-of-age ceremony, the headmaster congratulated us on stepping into the adult, reviewing the growth period that we had experienced. After that, we all watched the video of alumnus fighting against the epidemic.Thro

48、ugh the activity, what I felt is that I am able to shoulder the responsibility and make us stronger and more determined. When faced with the difficulties and failures, I must overcome them. In the future, I will be a good doctor to heal the wounded and rescue the dying, devoting myself to my work.Be

49、st wishes！Yours,Li Jin【导语】这是一篇应用文，要求写一封信。【详解】第一步:审题。审题的目的是获取重要信息。通过审题我们可以确定几个方面的信息。第一，假如你是晨光中学的李津。你校于6月8号举办了成人礼活动，你的英国朋友Chris 很想了解该活动。你于当晚给Chris 回一封电子邮件，介绍相关情况，内容包括:(1)成人礼活动内容(成长点滴回顾，观看校友抗疫事迹录像等)2. 对活动的感受。3. 对自己未来的展望。第二，人称为第一人称。第三，时态为一般现在时，一般过去时和一般将来时。第二步:布局段落，确定主要段落，次要段落，段落数量。这篇写作段落数量为三段。第一段:成人礼活动内

50、容(成长点滴回顾，观看校友抗疫事迹录像等)。第二段:对活动的感受；对自己未来的展望。第三段，表达期望。第三步:确定关键词汇和短语:congratulate sb on sth., be faced with, heal the wounded and rescue the dying, devote oneself to doing sth.；第四步:确定较为高级的句子:that引导的定语从句和现在分词作状语During the coming-of-age ceremony, the headmaster congratulated us on stepping into the adult,

51、 reviewing the growth period that we had experienced. that引导的表语从句Through the activity, what I felt is that I am able to shoulder the responsibility and make us stronger and more determined.时间状语从句的省略句When faced with the difficulties and failures, I must overcome them.第五步:连句成文，注意使用恰当的连接词进行过渡衔接:After t

52、hat, besides, however.第六步:注意书写，保持卷面整洁，避免划线，乱擦。【点睛】文章思路清晰，语言规范，段落整齐，语篇连贯，层次清晰。使用了较为高级的句式:that引导的定语从句和现在分词作状语During the coming-of-age ceremony, the headmaster congratulated us on stepping into the adult, reviewing the growth period that we had experienced. that引导的表语从句Through the activity, what I felt

53、is that I am able to shoulder the responsibility and make us stronger and more determined.时间状语从句的省略句When faced with the difficulties and failures, I must overcome them.等高级句式的应用提升了写作的档次，整个短文显示出了作者高水平的英语表达能力。9.（2020浙江7月高考卷）假定你是李华，你校来自爱尔兰的外教Peter因病回国休假。请给他写一封电子邮件，内容包括:1. 询问近况；2. 分享班级最新消息；3. 表达祝愿。注意:1.

54、词数80左右；2. 可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。_【答案】Dear Peter,I am sorry to hear that you have gone back home on sick leave. How are you feeling now?I hope my good news for you will sweep away the shadow of disease. Last month, an English festival was held in our school, and our class performed a song which you taught u

55、s at the festival. As soon as we finished the song, all the audience gave us warm applause. If only you had been there. We all miss you very much and wish you a quick and complete recovery.Yours,Li Hua【导语】本篇书面表达属于应用文，要求考生写一封邮件，向因病假回国休假的外教老师询问近况，分享消息和表达祝愿。【详解】第一步：审题体裁：应用文时态：根据提示，时态应为一般过去时和一般现在时。结构：三段

56、式结构。第一段询问近况；第二段告知班级消息；第三段表达祝愿。要求：1.询问近况（How are you feeling now?） 2.告知班级消息（my good news; performed a song which you taught us） 3.表达祝愿（wish you a quick and complete recovery）第二步:列提纲 （重点词组）be sorry to do; on sick leave; sweep away; as soon as; give sb. warm applause; recovery第三步：连词成句1. I am sorry to h

57、ear that you have gone back home on sick leave.2. I hope my good news for you will sweep away the shadow of disease.3. As soon as we finished the song, all the audience gave us warm applause.4. We all miss you very much and wish you a quick and complete recovery.根据提示及关键词（组）进行遣词造句，注意主谓一致和时态问题。连句成文，注意

58、使用恰当的连词进行句子之间的衔接与过渡，书写一定要规范清晰，第五步：润色修改【点睛】范文内容完整，要点全面，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当，上下文意思连贯，符合逻辑关系。1.作者在范文中使用了主从复合句，如：I am sorry to hear that you have gone back home on sick leave.( 听说你请病假回家了，我很难过。)这句话运用了that 引导宾语从句。Last month, an English festival was held in our school, and our class performed a song which you ta

59、ught us at the festival.(上个月，我们学校举办了英语节，我们班在节上表演了一首您教我们的歌曲。)这句话运用了which引导限制性定语从句。As soon as we finished the song, all the audience gave us warm applause.(我们一唱完这首歌，所有的观众都给了我们热烈的掌声。)这句话中as soon as引导时间状语从句。2.使用了一些固定词组，如be sorry to do; on sick leave; sweep away; as soon as; give sb. warm applause等。全文中没有

60、中国式英语的句式，显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外，文章思路清晰、层次分明，上下句转换自然，为文章增色添彩。10.（2020北京卷图画作文）假设你是红星中学高三（1）班班长李华。居家学习期间，你们班开展了一次以“自律”为主题的调研活动。请根据以下四幅图的先后顺序，写一篇英文稿件，给你们学校英文网站投稿，记述你在本次活动中发现问题并解决问题的过程。注意：词数不少于60。提示词：自律 self-discipline _【答案】While studying at home, I surveyed my class on “self-discipline”. The findings worried

61、me a lot. To solve the problem, I asked my parents for help, and they offered some practical advice. Then I held an online discussion with my classmates on how to well discipline ourselves. After that, we all knew better what to do. Three months later, I did a second survey, which showed great impro

62、vements in self-discipline. I phoned my teacher about it, and we both felt very pleased.【导语】本篇书面表达属于应用文。这是一篇图画作文，要求考生按以下四幅图的先后顺序，就你开展“自律”调研活动中发现问题并解决问题的过程写一篇英文稿件，向学校英文网站投稿。【详解】第一步：审题体裁：应用文时态：根据提示，时态应为一般过去时人称：第一人称为主结构：总分法 总分法指把主题句作为总说，把支持句作为分说，并以这种方式安排所写内容。要求：1. 表明写作主题“自律”2. 根据图片描写事件过程：第一幅图片描写自己对“自律”

63、调研结果很担忧；第二幅图片描写自己向父母求助解决方法/建议；第三幅图片描写自己和同学们在网上讨论如何自律；第四幅图片描写三个月后，大家自律能力有了很大提高，我和老师很高兴。第二步:列提纲 （重点词组）ask sb. for help；practical advice；an online discussion；do a second survey第三步：连词成句1. I asked my parents for help, and they offered some practical advice.2. Then I held an online discussion with my clas

64、smates on how to well discipline ourselves.3. I did a second survey, which showed great improvements in self-discipline.(根据提示及关键词（组）进行遣词造句，注意主谓一致和时态问题。）第四步：连句成篇（衔接词）1.表文章结构顺序：First of all, Firstly/First, Secondly/Second And then, Finally, In the end, At last, Last but not least2.表并列补充关系：What is more

65、, Besides, Moreover, Furthermore, In addition, As well as, not onlybut (also), including, also3.表转折对比关系：However, On the contrary, but, Although + clause (从句), In spite of + n/doing, On the one hand,On the other hand Some,while others,as for, sothat 4.表因果关系：Because, As, So, Thus, Therefore, As a resu

66、lt 5表换一种方式表达：In other words, that is to say,6.表进行举例说明：For example; For instance; such as + n/doing 7.表陈述事实：In fact, frankly speaking8.表选择：eitheror，or连句成文，注意使用恰当的连词进行句子之间的衔接与过渡，书写一定要规范清晰。第五步：润色修改【点睛】范文内容完整，结构严谨，要点全面，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当，上下文意思连贯，符合逻辑关系。作者在范文中使用了主从复合句，如which showed great improvements in self-discipline这句话中用了which引导的非限制性定语从句；使用了非常好的短语，如ask sb. for help，an online discussion，do a second survey等，为文章增色不少。全文中没有中国式英语的句式，显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外，文章思路清晰、层次分明，上下句转换自然，为文章增色添彩。